Taming the Queen of Beasts

GAHRYE

"How bad is it?" Kalle asked, her face buried in his chest, muffling her voice.

"The worst we imagined." His voice was toneless, heavy. "It\'s all clear now. As soon as Gar and Aaryn talked about what was happening over there… Just like that. Everything clicked into place—the reason both of us are needed. The fact that the disformed have finally been recognized as a tribe—you have no idea what honor there is in that, Kalle. That\'s got to be the most unbelievable part of all of this… They\'re being recognized, set apart, acknowledged before the Creator. And the fucked up part is that it\'s all happening right before he destroys them."

Kalle shuddered. "He has to have a good reason. You\'ve told me that all along. Right from the beginning."

Gahrye nodded, unable to shake the conviction himself, even in the circumstances. "I just wish he\'d share them. Because right now when I look ahead, all I see is death on death. Death, on death, on death. But it\'s the only way to stop everyone else from dying. Like, how much is too much?"

"Too much is the Anima disappearing. Being taken by these sickos. We can\'t let it happen, Gahrye. Even if it costs us. Even if it costs them. There\'s no freedom in a cage. I\'m confident if you told them their choices were a fight to the death, or life in a cage, they\'ll all choose to fight."

She was right.

Then, before he could answer, Kalle sighed so heavily it sounded like it came from her toes. "Love in silence. Love in distance. Love in death," she quoted the prophecy.

Gahrye nodded bitterly.

"Do you understand the others yet?"

"I think so. I do want to go through it one more time before we leave. But that\'s really just to make sure. I want to double check. I want Reece to double check me."

"You\'ve never needed his double check before."

"I\'ve never had to make the call that would cause the death of others before." He went still, then. Both of them knowing what he\'d left unsaid.

When Kalle did eventually speak, her voice was sharp with tears. "You should have told Gar and Aaryn. They should have gone home knowing this, Gahrye. Able to prepare and make the most of their time."

He shook his head. "No, they\'ll survive this. And as the one sitting in front of them, knowing who was going to die, and who wasn\'t… I wouldn\'t put that burden on my worst enemy, Kalle. I gave them a day. A single day to enjoy and celebrate. Let them have it. I can promise you when they\'re looking back on this they\'ll be grateful for it. Especially Gar. A brand new mate and he has to face this. It\'s fucked up."

Kalle\'s face was sad, but she gathered him in again and they held each other.

"You\'re such a romantic," she said quietly into his chest. "I\'m so blessed."

"No, not a romantic," he said, stroking her hair. "I just remember what it was like. Do you? Back when we knew we were going to get torn apart? Everything was on a timeframe. Everything was maybe-the-last-time. Nothing could just be. I hated it. I was always waiting or the moment it would end and it sucked the joy of out of everything. Do you remember?"

She nodded under his chin. "I didn\'t believe you. Not completely. But it did make me tense."

Gahrye sighed. "I didn\'t want to do that to them."

Kalle pulled her head back far enough to meet his eyes, her hands playing up and down his long back. "I love your soft heart, Gahrye. The way you care about everyone, not just me. I love it. I love you."

"I love you too," Gahrye said the words like breathing. They were so natural. So unnecessary, and yet the only thing that was true. Yet, he was frowning at the carpet, his head spinning with all the ways he was going to hurt people in the coming days. Hurt people he loved. People who loved others. Who didn\'t have this chance to hold their loved ones and say the important things.

He groaned.

Kalle\'s hands tightened at his back. "Gahrye, you can\'t carry this. This wasn\'t your call. It\'s not your plan. It\'s not your choice. You\'re just the messenger. You\'ve done everything you can. Please…" she took his jaw in her hand and pulled his head up, made him meet her eyes. "Don\'t take responsibility for this. Don\'t carry it. It\'s not your plan."

He took a deep breath and squeezed her, nodding, though he wasn\'t sure he could do what she asked.

"How much time do we have?" she asked quietly, afraid of the answer.

Gahrye cleared his throat. "Not very long, a few days. A week or two, tops."

Kalle blinked, surprised, but nodded. "The Creator knows what he\'s doing," she repeated, as if she was trying to convince herself.

Gahrye agreed as he already had. But as he pulled her close again and their bodies pasted to each other, he had the same thought he\'d had earlier when they discussed it.

He wished the Creator would share His reasons. The purpose all this death served. Because on this side of it…. on this side of it, it just looked like pain.

There was a noise in the living room and Kalle tensed. "Reece."

Gahrye nodded. The door was locked, His son wouldn\'t be treated to a live-action shot of his mother\'s ass. But that still meant their focus needed to shift. But Gahrye couldn\'t quite bring himself to let her go, to release her so she could get changed.

It wasn\'t until the doorknob rattled and Reece\'s voice rose on its other side that he loosened his grip on her.

"Seriously? You two are way too old for this. You\'re going to end up breaking something."

Despite himself, Gahrye snorted. Kalle pulled away from him, rolling her eyes.

"I\'m just getting changed, Reece," she called through the door. "Just give us a minute."

"Liar, this place stinks of sex. Seriously, Dad, you\'re a freak."

It was more tension than humor that got Kalle giggling. Tension and relief in equal measure, because their son was finally back, and clearly safe.

Gahrye felt it too, but he couldn\'t crack a smile. Because now they had to figure out how to talk to him about all of this.